“Suicide doesn’t take away the pain, it gives it to someone else.”
This is from a Five Finger Death Punch music video. Makes me cry every time.
Wow, sounds silly, but i’ve only just understood why people say suicide is selfish
I’ve always had a problem with people calling suicide selfish. I get where it comes from but I still feel like it’s blaming people for their illness, blaming them for not being able to cope anymore. I agree that suicide passes on pain, but I can’t seem to come to terms with calling suicide selfish. Is that wrong? idk.
I definitely disagree with calling suicide selfish. Yes the act of suicide can cause so much pain to the people around them but they were in pain for so long, and often people don’t know or don’t reach out. I think it is perfectly normal to want to stop your pain and suffering, it is instinct. As someone who has know someone to commit suicide and has thought about it , it is not selfish. When you suffer like for so long that not even friends, family, or hobbies can bring you joy, what else are you to do? And unless you have ever seriously considered or attempted suicide, don’t tell me there is always another way.
To me depression is being stuck in a pool a quicksand, holding on to a branch. Sometimes you start to pull yourself out, sometimes you can barely breath. And even if you are almost out, there is still that bit clinging to your leg, and if you get out, it sticks to your shoes as you circle the edge, always afraid of tripping and falling in. And that can be your whole life. Climbing out, falling in, hanging on the edge. If you don’t live your life like that, then don’t tell me suicide is selfish.
As someone who HAS seriously considered suicide on multiple occasions and has dealt with feeling like there is no way out, or feeling like it won’t get better, and as someone who has known others who have attempted or succeeded with suicide, I can honestly say I do feel that suicide is selfish.
I hated myself with every fiber of my being, loathed every second I was forced to be in my own presence. I couldn’t bear myself. Nothing brought me joy. Not my friends, not my family. I felt like I was an enormous burden to them, and I could not understand why they liked me, let alone loved me. Most days, I convinced myself that my friends only kept me around out of pity or maliciousness.
I flirted with suicide, fantasized about cutting my wrists and bleeding out. Or starving myself to death. I stopped eating because I felt I was unworthy of food, yet I hated the way I looked naked, with all the bones sticking out. One day, I didn’t know if I wanted to get a painful piercing or try suicide, so I flipped a coin. I got the piercing. My life meant that little to me.
I saw no way out. Yet, I saw my brother in this same position just a few short years earlier, when he threatened suicide and attempted, claiming no one loved him and we all hated him. I saw my mother confessing to me that sometimes she just wanted to jump in front of a semi to end it all.
I HAVE lived with that black depression, from both within and without, and saw what threats of suicide and attempts have done - not only to the person doing them, but to their loved ones.
Maybe suicide isn’t completely selfish, because I remember thinking about my friends and family at times, and thinking they would be sad if I killed myself. But I disagree with it being unselfish.
When you jump at every ambulance siren you hear - and you know which it is because you’ve memorized them - wondering if it’s your brother or mother in there because they tried to kill themselves, it doesn’t feel like a selfless endeavor. When you freak out because someone joked that your mother tried to commit suicide and you can’t find her, it doesn’t feel selfless. When you have to sit for hours in a waiting room at a psychiatric hospital just for the chance that you might get to visit your brother for five minutes because he tried to commit suicide again, it doesn’t feel selfless.
I know what it’s like to want to die because I was literally unable to see a way out; but I also know what it’s like to watch from the outside.
Suicide isn’t entirely selfish, because people in that situation DO think about the ones they’re hurting, but neither is it selfless. You do hurt people, you do cause them pain. Maybe people need to read the signs that you’re hurting, but you also need to let someone know you are. Not everyone exhibits the signs, and not everyone is adept at reading them.